March 24, 2010

So Says the Sarge: Free Baby, Comes with Bottles and Diapers

So it's been 6 weeks since Mommy went away for a few days and came home with this thing called a "baby". They say he is named after Grandpa, but they don't call him "Grandpa" they call him "Jamie" (and sometimes "Monkey", whatever that is!)

While I've gotten used to him, I'm not sure yet if I like him. He acts like he can't do anything for himself and he cries ALL the time. What does he have to cry about? I have to walk everywhere and they carry him, I have to go outside when I potty and he can potty where he is and they change him while making funny faces. He gets to eat 10times a day (really, I counted) but I only eat twice! When he starts to cry they pick him up, when I bark, they tell me to hold on they'll let me out in a minute. He talks all the time too, but he doesn't make any sense. It's all jibberish, but Mommy pretends to understand him. I think she is losing her mind from lack of sleep.

Talking about sleep, he is awake at craxy times! Sometimes when Mommy is rocking him late at night, I'll go and lay down next to the chair, but most of the time, I go sleep in the hallway or even go downstairs to the sofa! I am only getting about 12 hours of sleep a day now.

Mommy and Daddy are always getting up to see what he is crying about. He sleeps in this swing-thing that rocks him and you think he would go right to sleep, but as soon as I lay down on Mommy or Daddy's lap, he starts to cry and then I have to get up. I don't like the swing anyway, it keeps hitting me in the head!

He has a lot of toys that he doesn't play with, but I can't play with them either. At first I was really upset, I mean I really like the ones that squeek or make noise, but now I don't even care. Daddy got me a Harley-Davidson squeeky toy and I just lay on my bed with that and my bones. I hope Jamie doesn't try to take my stuff. If I can't play with his, then he should not be able to play with mine!

Well, I think I'm going to go lay down on Daddy lays down, that way I can get in the middle and the baby has to sleep in his own bed!

Here are some pictures Mommy has taken of us ...

4 Tea Party Guest:

Expat Girl said...

Aww that was the cutest post and sooo accurate haha I cant wait to see my dog react when I bring the baby home. I have a feeling she will throw a tantrum or two!

Sue said...

ummm, SGT Major,
Adorable post - and pictures.
But I don't see the neglect factor. :) I will keep looking at your cute little face to be sure, (but pssst,between you and me, I think you are a pretty lucky puppy - Jamie doesn't walk yet....just wait!).
Then you might have a REALLY good case going.
Meanwhile, you could probably use this "alone" time to get into mischief and not get into trouble.
And to your Mommy - Jamie is a beautiful baby. Blessings and hugs to you all - including SGT. Major - he might need an extra one.

Cheryl said...

Your little boy is gorgeous!

Personalized Sketches and Sentiments said...

Aw! How cute was this post? I love the photos and his narration. He looks so gentle with Jamie. And Jamie looks like he is loving Sarge.

Blessings & Aloha!