Idiocracy ...

Have you ever seen that movie Idiocracy, where Luke Wilson plays Private Joe Bauers, the definition of "average American", who is selected by the Pentagon to be the guinea pig for a top-secret hibernation program. Forgotten, he awakes 500 years in the future and discovers a society so incredibly dumbed-down that he's easily the most intelligent person alive?

I swear sometimes I feel like I am living that in real-life. Take for example my little "quick" trip to Michaels last night for some last minute supplies for a project I am working on.

I told hubbyt I'd be quick. It's about 3 miles from the house, I planned run in grab some embroidery floos and a few sheets of scrapbook paper, maybe look at Halloween stuff on sale and be back in time to put the cooling leftovers from dinner in the fridge. Ha! Who was I kidding. By the time I made it back home, hubby had not only put the food away but cleaned the whole kitchen!

So here's what happened:

I ran into Michaels as planned. I grabbed some scrapbook paper for a flip book I am making for Jamie with his swim pictures. The got distracted by the Fall and Halloween decor (like I knew I would). There was a cute project sheet for decorating a charger for Fall so I grabbed a sheet and then remembered I wanted to grab a charger for some cinnamon pillar candles I'd been toting around for 3 years. I then wandered over to the table docor shelf and picked up a beautiful wrought iron pumpkin candle holder that was on sale for 50% off! On the next shelf was the Halloween stuff and I wanted to see what was on sale because it's hubby's favorite holiday and I wanted to decorate with stuff he'd like too. I saw these adorable black iron spider table top candleholders that were on sale for 30% off. Ah, I love sales ... Anyway, I did quick math in my head, realised I have enough cash to get it with the stuff I needed as well. So I quickly ran over to the needlepoint section, grabbed the floss that I needed and headed to the register.

Maybe it was just all falling into place too well and something had to go wrong, but when I got to my turn in line and the cashier started to ring things up, I noticed that the spider candleholder was at full price. "I'm sorry," I said, "but the spider was on sale."

No, it's ringing up full price," she said.

"I'm sure there was a sign next to it saying it was 30% or 50% off," I said, which was met with a look of boredom from the cashier. The shae radioed the manager, "There's a customer who says a candleholder is on sale but its ringing up as regualr price," she said with the most boredom I've heard in a long time. She waited a minute then said, "He said if it was on sale it'd ring up that price."

"Do you mind go look while you finish scanning," I asked, trying again.

"I guess," she said.

I ran over and sure enough there was the sign, "30% Off Celebrate It! Halloween Decor Tabletop". Not wanting to take the sign off the rack, I took 2 quick pictures with my phone making sure the sign and spiders were visable and went back to the register.

"Oh, you took a picture," said when I handed her the phone. She returned a few minutes later She stood there almost a full minute looking at the picture then radioed the manager. I'm not sure what he said, but she said, "This says 'Celebrate it! Tabletop Candleholder Collection," looking at the tag on the spider.

"Well, there were decorated candles next to it, not everything was a candleholder," I said.

"Let me go see," she said and left to go look.

I stood there feeling so bad that the lady with the infant behind me was waiting, but she assured me she'd do the same. The cashier returned and pulled out a sales paper and S-L-O-W-L-Y flipped through it. She radioed the manager again, then looked through the paper again.

"I ... guess ... I ... can ... just ... give ... you ... 30% ... off ..." she said dragging each word out as if it took every ounce of energy she had.

She finished ringing me up and I apologized to the lady with the baby again, who smiled and said no problem, before leaving.

I mean, was it really that difficult?!? You would think I was trying to get 50% off a car at a dealership, not 30% off a $4.99 candleholder! Does everything here in Miami have to be SO DARN DIFFICULT!?!

Well, I got my spider and here is a picture of it with my candles I got on sale at Yankee Candle ... Now, Yankee Candle- they have GREAT customer service!!

Until our next cup of tea ...